'Pent-up' emotions...

Uhhhhhhh.............................

For the past week or so until today, always feel like 'screaming my head off'.  Really felt very frustrated - the more I think about it, running the scenarios inside my brain - I really feel like screaming my head off and wish I could do a bungy jump from the top of MBS down to the ground. That way, maybe all my pent-up emotions will be blown away.

Why am I in this 'mode' or rather this mood. Well the more I think about my lost privacy in this home this house, the more I felt 'short changed' by my bro.  I have slogged half of my life working hard, saving money, and at the end of the day managed to so-called owned a flat. Now, my bro and his family is staying in my house 'half free' and my flat is over-crowded overnight. 

I have no more a bedroom to myself (so miserable) and after sometime praying that they will move out soon. Yes, they did mention about moving out about a year ago (after staying for around one and half year) but then changed their mind and carrying on staying here. 

Nowadays whenever I thought about how in the past - I have a bedroom to myself and my mum also has a room to herself.  Life could be better for the both of us until they moved in and looked like 'shi lai ze bu ju'. The way I see my bro - hanging onto his 'unstable income n flexible' job - didn't bother much to look for part time jobs to contribute to the household expenses. Not sure what's his mindset. If he had 20 years ago - stick to a stable income job - by now he could have own a flat/house and feed his own family good enough. Have thought of telling him off but he's a big man now, old enough to be sensible. If, I say if I am strong enough - would have given him a good punch to wake him up to face the reality face the world.

Now whenever I came home from work, I will see the floor messy, the table messy, my bed messy (with all the washed clothes lying there) - really an 'eyesore'. Its been a long time (3 years) since I last saw my house spick and span.  Sigh.............when can this scene appears again...........when will all these people move out from my house for GOOD ???

Another thing, I dread to come home everytime after work.  Wish I have all the energy to work 24 hours without resting, sleeping, eating.  Yes, wish soooooooooooooo.

Well, its just the 3rd day of the New Year - wish my wish (the one that they will move out for good) will come true soon. (Not the wish that I could work 24 hrs).

Cheers, baby, no matter what or how, you (I) still need to face up to all happenings in the house, right ?

Be positive, be of good cheers, forget about all the unhappiness+ frustrations+emotionales+ (-)................................................................................................