Some 'feelings'

Some feelings (what's the appropriate phrase to use ? it just didn't popped up in my brain).

Have not been writing on my blog for about a month.

I was in hospital early this week for some health problems - at last it was 'settled' through minor surgery and the 'big stone' dropped off from my chest smoothly.  What a relief !  God has been kind very kind to me though I have not been doing my part well enough.  I also have this close friend in church who really encouraged and gave me emotional support when I needed it.
Praise The Lord !

On the night before I went to hospital, I was unhappy with my S-I-L who told my mum that she could fetch me but not long later she changed her mind and asked my bro to fetch me (as told by the helper).  Ya, I know, I am just the least important person in her life.  Her friends are her 'everything'. I asked myself - I have been treating quite well and she just can't do me this little favour (its my mum who asked her to fetch me to hospital). I am 'pissed' off - you know !
Well at least I know inside my heart who is good or bad to me - yes I knew it.

I personally do not like to owe people favours - hardly asked people (be it my family members, my friends, my colleagues) for favours.

I know - most of my family members are very 'xian shi'.  To put it in another way, most of the times they only call me when they need financial help from me - I am their 'gold mine'. I just can't get along with my siblings My siblings and I - we hardly talk, don't get along well so we are not that close - so sad, right ?  I only talked to my close friend when I am feeling down or I have problems but not to my siblings, but I do have one sister who treats me nicely. I appreciate her kindness. I really envy my friends who are very close with their siblings.  ENVY!!!

Sigh - I always like to use/say it when life sucks.  LIFE is short - must learn to make myself happy everyday and smile.

(Side-track a bit) I was quite excited this morning because I am going to meet my Sweet Angel in the afternoon.  Today we have some small talks. We get to know each other a little more. She is always so sweet and gentle - I am fond of her but she will never know about my feelings. I would not and dare not tell her. I would only keep it inside my heart.

No imaginations please !